Fig Leaf or Curtain?

Fig Leaf or Curtain?

When we travel we usually only book the first day and last day

Booking.com & Air BnB have been fantastic. DID YOU KNOW – that If one makes a reservation the day before booking in , one is often offered up to 50 % discount and great flexible arrival/departure hours.

The story that follows is just one of the amusing recounts of a night (reserved less than 24 hours before) in a beautiful self catering unit in Johannesburg

I introduce to you LAUREL & HARDEY ….. Chris & Roz

After long hours of driving to our destination, then navigating traffic – in unfamiliar territory – in the largest city in South Africa, Johannesburg – we arrive at our lovely accommodation

The Host & Hostess , Gavin & Vicky, were welcoming and warm and full of laughter. We couldn’t find the exact place SatNav sent us to and we called in distress – for better directions

WE WERE IN THE RIGHT PLACE, at ETA!!!
However, as Johannesburg has a very high crime rate there are gated estates. All but one street, in blocks of streets, are closed off by fences and high gates. The entrances into these compounds (for want of a better word) are manned by Security Guards and booms

We are South African Citizens and aware of the crime reputation – so we had armed ourselves with water pistols, plastic snakes on the dashboard and rear window, knob kerries, spears, spooks, poisoned sweets, tazers, wheels that knives pop out of whilst driving, pepper spray in the windscreen water , flame throwing device from exhaust pipe etc…………

ONLY KIDDING YOU. …… waaaaa!

This is where we were discombobulated and confused – how do we find “IN” to the “INN”??????

Tring Tring – how did we survive WITHOUT CELL PHONES????!!
Right, directions all clear – we arrive to the greeting of 3 members of the Air BnB household standing in the street WAVING AT/FOR US. How cute.

SO WE MOVE IN, HEATERS PUT ON BY OUR HOSTESS, BED TURNED DOWN, CURTAINS CLOSED, SUITCASES, BAGS, FOOD ETC SPREAD EVERYWHERE – exhausted……. Shattered but happy

Our Hostess fed us Old Brown Sherry, delicious Butternut Soup, Chicken (and vegetarian for me) Spaghetti (were you aware of the H in spaghetti?) followed by mouth watering – jeans button popping, next hole on belt – diet killing – desserts

Late in the evening we trotted back to our cottage – all entertained, fed and watered like thoroughbred horses

I begin unpacking whilst Chris goes to shower. I hung all our clothes in the bedroom closets, moved the heater in there too for a while …. and back into the living room /tv room/ kitchen area, pulling the adjoining door to almost shut.

WHAT HAPPENED NEXT………….

A distraught pale faced husband flies through into the kitchen, in his BIRTHDAY SUIT (Nude) , wet & shivering with cold – I thought he had seen a ghost! ………

He had turned the shower on, and stood under the water – waiting for it to heat up – but it DIDN’T. Oh boy!!

Chris’ mission was to find the Electrical Board in the kitchen , checking the Geyser was switched on. IT WAS OFF – boo hoo.

I was struck by this tornado of activity in the Living area of the apartment, dressed in my undies only – remember everything had been unpacked into the bedroom.

SUDDENLY – WE HEAR A “THUD – CLONK”

The bedroom door (behind which was also a running shower) had SLAMMED SHUT…………. AND THE DOOR HANDLE ON THE OTHER SIDE FALLEN OFF.

Oh my word – do we dress in a CURTAIN and use cushions as FIG LEAVES to go to the Host and Hostess for help. Predicament!!

Nope we had to solve this with pride and ingenuity….. in the nick.

An assortment of knives adorned the floor as we tried to find the right size to disengage the metal bar holding the latch in place, inside the door.

CLICK, FLICK, KICK, CRASH – Open Sesame…. Problem solved with dignity and relief. SUDDENLY A COLD SHOWER LOOKED ATTRACTIVE – bon nuit, soft mattress,

glorious
Hot shower
in the morning!

I am a child of Africa, born in beautiful Rhodesia (now Zimbabwe) and grew up on a beautiful Tobacco Farm. I've moved many many times and do not really know where I want to put my forever roots down. I have fun doing everyday things away from my home, trying to see the wonderment of life through the eyes of a child. A day out, weekend away, week away...... And months' travelling hold magical memories and events. These are what make me who I am - cautious, adventurous, fun loving & hungry to discover colours, countries, geography, cultures and experiences... and I'm normal too ... tiring travel makes me frowny too sometimes. .... With my lovely life partner (Chris), passport, medical kit, credit card I go..... wherever the wanderings take us..........

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